WIFE - I don't care for all these silly celebrations - Mother's Day, WOMEN'S DAY etc. To me, every day should be special and enjoyed equally!
HUSBAND - And yet, you made me sleep on the couch when I forgot our wedding anniversary...
Monday, March 8, 2021
Sunday, February 28, 2021
SKIP THE BUMP
Why are you giving me a fist bump?? Take my temperature, you fool!
Sunday, May 10, 2020
MULTI-TASKING GODDESS
FATHER - Kids, listen to this beautiful quote - God could not be everywhere and therefore he made mothers.
MOTHER - There, you see?? Even God cannot do everything at once. And you people expect me to cook, clean, do the laundry, iron and listen to your woes all at the same time!!
Tuesday, March 31, 2020
WORK FROM HOME SYNDROME
JANUARY 2020 - If you don't go to school. you'll only grow up to be a house maid!
MARCH 2020 (Corona Virus lock down) - Mop a little harder there. You missed a spot.
Wednesday, March 25, 2020
ISOLATION CONSOLATION
EARTH - Who would have thought that this would be the solution...
All my people have to do in order to live in harmony is to stay as far away from each other as possible!
Sunday, March 22, 2020
CUR-FEW CUR-MANY
ON A REGULAR DAY -
FRIEND 1 - Hey bro, come and look at that beautiful sunset outside.
FRIEND 2 - Not now man. Let me finish posting my updates on Facebook,Twitter and Instagram.
ON THE JANATA CURFEW DAY -
I wonder how much the grass has grown since last night... I hope we have enough milk and tomatoes in the refrigerator... I wonder if that pothole has gotten deeper on the main road... Why are all the birds chirping so loudly in the trees....
Wednesday, March 18, 2020
OUTBREAK BREAK OUT
THIEF - Quick, let us get out of here before someone sees us!
MOTHER - Look at those responsible citizens wearing masks during this Corona Virus outbreak!
Friday, March 6, 2020
Tuesday, March 3, 2020
MASK TASK
TEACHER - So children, with this whole Corona Virus global outbreak, we encourage you all to wear masks to keep the infection from spreading.
Monday, March 2, 2020
SU-MOVE WRESTLING
SPECTATOR - So the challenge is to try and move that mighty Sumo wrestler. Looks quite tough, doesn't it??
Not exactly what I had in mind, but, Golly, he sure managed to 'move' that wrestler!
Thursday, January 16, 2020
PROFESSIONS OF A PROFESSION
FATHER - A salon stylist?? Are you sure you want to be touching people's body hair for the rest of your life for a living??
SON - So what, dad - as a pathologist, you touch people's blood and urine for a living!
Friday, January 3, 2020
ONION ZINDABAD - II
WAITER - Sir, would you like me to pack the rest of the Chef'a special biryani to take back home?
CUSTOMER - Forget the biryani. Just pack all these onion slices that you served on the side. I'll take those back home.
ONION ZINDABAD - I
Hello?? Is this the Income Tax department? Yes, I'd like to report my affluent neighbour. I've been observing large bags of onions being delivered to their house frequently and find it very suspicious!
Tuesday, November 12, 2019
DARE TO IMPROVISE
ASSISTANT DIRECTOR - Sir, we've run out of fake blood for the action sequence. Should we just wrap up and call it a day?
DIRECTOR - No, production costs are too high. Just ask my driver to spit his paan juice at the required spots and get done with.
Tuesday, October 8, 2019
FRAUD GOD
SECURITY GUARD - I'm sorry, no fans allowed in the Durga pandal. That superstar celebrity has asked for complete privacy to pray in peace!
DEVOTEE - My dear fellow, I am not here for that 'demi-god'. I'm here for the actual God.
Tuesday, July 2, 2019
APP JAISA KOI
So I randomly tried the Snapchat gender swap filter on Ranveer Singh and Lady Gaga. I'm not sure if the app is working because it just turned them into each other!
Monday, June 17, 2019
THIS TASTEFUL
CUSTOMER - This dish has a very unusual taste. What do you call it?
WAITER - It's Umami, sir.
CUSTOMER - Look man, if you don't know then just say so. No need to insult my mother!
Tuesday, May 28, 2019
ADDICT-IONARY
TEACHER - Can you please run down to the staff room and bring my dictionary. I need to refer to it for the spelling test.
STUDENT - Ma'am, why don't you use the spell check in your smart phone instead? The staff room is quite far away.
Friday, March 8, 2019
WHOA-MEN'S DAY
And to conclude, here's wishing all you pretty ladies a very Happy Women's Day!
That's not fair! With all this talk of equality and empowerment, don't you think you should be wishing the ugly ones too ??
Monday, February 4, 2019
CELE-ABRATIONS
How time flies! Priyanka and Nick are already celebrating their first wedding anniversary...
Oh, I'm afraid not. That celebration would be yet another one of their wedding receptions.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)